Fractions  

Shards, bits and pieces.

Blobs of Glup


The Penis Rants - I
 
It occurred to me recently that men are far more identified with their genitalia than women are with theirs. This is obviously not a new thought, but some of the manifestations struck me as interesting. In particular, I note that names for the male genitalia are often used as insults. "He's a dick." "What a prick." "Don't be such a putz." "You poor shmuck." You rarely hear women insulted by reference to their genitalia. Nobody ever calls anyone a "vulva." The only name for the vagina that gets used as an insult is pretty much a nuclear weapon in the verbal arsenal, and most people seem to have agreed to a no-first-use policy. (And in the shredded remnants of the British Empire, that particular name is applied to men more than women, and, perhaps as a result, seems less devastating. "He's a silly cunt, that Nigel.") Male genitalia insults are definitely conventional weapons.

I also find it interesting that some men share a real life nickname with a penis-based insult: Dick. How many snickers does that name provoke? How many times does poor Richard have to hear "Don't be a dick, Dick"? You don't see this with women, as far as I know. (Pussy Galore was a fictional character.)

But I digress. The penis definitely gets a bad rap -- despite its prominent position in the male identity, it has somehow taken on a negative connotation. Not so the testicles. Far from it! The testicles are apparently the source of all that makes a man a real man (and much that makes a woman worthy of attention as well.) "That took some real balls" can be said about anybody, male or female, who has shown what used to be called "intestinal fortitude." I don't know... They just sit back and relax, the poor penis does all the work, but the testicles get the glory. Life is so unfair.

Moving on. I've never understood why anybody would name his penis. Why would a penis need a name? (To appropriate the punchline to an old joke, it doesn't come when you call it. Though on second thought, that may not be as true as I first thought.) I never named my own penis, and I've never discussed the trend, if it is one, with anyone else. There never seems to be a good time to bring up the topic in casual conversation. ("Here's that report you wanted, Bob." "Thanks. Say, Joe, do you have a nickname for your penis?") Nor has any of the women I've known ever felt the need to name it. That's just as well. I'd be afraid of what they might come up with. Plus, once something has a name, it becomes a buddy. I'd be worried they'd start preferring to talk to my penis than to me. Pretty soon, I'm the third wheel on dates. It's just ugly to contemplate. Maybe I need to take a survey. Questions for men: Does your penis have a name? What is its name? Who named it, you or a significant other? Do you feel pressured to live up to your penis's name? Questions for women: Does your significant other's penis have a name? Did you name it? What do you call it? Is that supposed to be funny?

  posted by dan @ 8:23 PM


Tuesday, June 11, 2002  

Introduction
 
a churning cascade
carving canyons to the sea
begins with one drop

  posted by dan @ 10:05 PM


Sunday, April 14, 2002  
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